And now I'm single... and I'm kinda glad I am.
Even our break up talk was strange, I laid it all out and told him why I act the way I do and told him that we rushed into things and with everything else going on I just didn't have the energy to start up a new relationship.
I told him about how my coursework comes first and that I was teetering on that point of where I stop focusing on that and start on that slippery dip into self loathing and destruction.
In short, I gave him a VERY long winded version of the 'Its not you, its me' speech.
His response... Well if we go back to being 'just friends' will you be OK with me returning to my usual slutty self where I go out clubbing and see other guys.
Only he put it in just such a way that it made it sound like it was all my fault he was about to turn into a slut again.
Rule number 1 of dealing with Nelo: NEVER try and lay a guilt trip on me, specially not with stuff like that.
Maybe this time I pushed away for a reason... maybe I'm not fucked up, I've just developed a subconscious bullshit meter.
Better luck next time ey?
The meeting with the boss went as well as could be expected... I've had my vent and now have an avenue to pursue things further should they arise again.
I'm thinking Avoca isn't gonna like me cause I've thrown them into the shit, but someone had to. After all, they're the ones doing the wrong thing and they chose not to listen when I pointed it out.
And bring on Thursday :)
I booked in an appointment today to have my hair cut and coloured, its gonna cost the better part of $200 but I don't care.
And really, it sounds like just what I need... my own hair stylist, a colourist and beautician to do my waxing and tinting. In short... a small army of people all there to make me look hot. Bring it on!
But now, I have a stack of reading to do. Anyone wanna analyse a Child Protection policy for me?
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Will have to look up the child protection policy, is there by any chance a Nelo protection policy chapter in there? Thou shalt not .... :)
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you are going to have a major make over. It reminds me a Oz program on the telly about how they will make you look ten years young in so many days. Maybe you can show us the before & after pic's, then we can go euw then aah, "what a difference" :)
Happy ready, let me know if you find that chapter ;)
Oh Nelo honey well done for being upfront and honest about your feelings with The Artist, better that way that 4 months down the line and all deeper in to misery.
ReplyDeleteStanding up for yoursself is the right thing to do. Good luck and enjoy your pamper day.