Moving Day

So it's 4am, moving day has finally arrived.
Still trying to make sense of all the crap going on in my head...
I was supposed to go to Bendigo today to get my scarf and a few other things I left at J's place the other night and then to see Casey one last time before I moved.

Unfortunately, as is usually the way when I stay out all night socialising, I woke up at about 4pm. Which didn't leave me with any time to do anything except pack really.

I'm a bit shattered at that really, cause I was rather looking forward to some more cuddles from J. He was to from the sounds of it. Oh well, I've promised him I'll call in on my way back home to Maryborough later on this week (man that sounds strange, I'm moving out and have already planned to come back home) -but I guess this is what happens when one keeps their job here.

As far as Casey goes, well I'm planning on calling in on her quickly before I leave.
What kind of a best friend leaves without saying goodbye? I wanted to get her a little something from me (she seems to think that once I move I'll forget about her and find new friends and never come back).
I think she's underestimating just how much of a friend I consider her. I'd do anything for that girl, all she has to do is ask :)

As for me, well I'm really not sure how I feel right now. There is so much going through my head at the moment.
As far as packing goes, I'm rather chilled out. I have all my major bits and pieces sorted, and Dad has a truck organised to move it all down in. So as long as all the big stuff goes down tomorrow, I'll be able to get the little bits I've missed when I come back here for work.

Emotionally, I feel a little confused really. I have so many mixed emotions about all of this.
Part of me is hugely excited about embarking on this, not to mention achieving the goal I set for myself what seems like an eternity ago.
I can't wait to be running around my new uni campus (it's massive compared to the one in Bendigo -so gonna get lost!)
Then there's the new friends I'll make and have made that I'll get to hang out with, not to mention the whole city culture I'll once again be able to immerse myself in.
Not to mention finally being able to have a bake off with Brat like we've talked about so many times before!

But then there's a sadness as well, because I know I won't see those I hold dear quite so readily anymore. No more random coffee dates with Casey and Charli at the drop of a hat, or us laughing at the fact that half the town thinks I'm Charli's Dad because they see me pushing the pram down the main street with Charli yelling out 'dad-da' at the worst possible moments.
Then there's Mum, with me moving out she'll be the only permanent resident of the house. Sure she has Ian, but even she needs time out from him. Plus, he has no idea of how to react to Mum's need to debrief after a stressful day at work.

The other thing that really got to me today was seeing my room slowly begin to empty, there was one point where I had a few tears rolling down my cheeks...

Finally, the thought of a person who I left behind popped back into my head for the first time in ages the other night. LX... the guy who I haven't spoken to since the disastrous ending to what ever it was that we had.
I'm seriously considering sending him a text to say that I finally moved and to thank him.
That sounds strange I know, but it was because of him that all of this has happened.
I want to make this clear right now, that I've done all of this for me and at no point in time was I ever doing this for him.
But, LX made me realise (though he probably doesn't know it) that I had absolutely nothing going for me here and that if I continued the way I was, that I would end up right where I didn't want to be. With no hope of ever achieving any of my dreams and stuck in a backwater country town with no hope of escape.

Even now I find myself wondering how he's doing... but at the same time, I guess I should probably just forget about it and leave the past behind me.

So here's to the end of one chapter of my life and the beginning of another.

I'm not sure when I'll get the chance to blog again... but here's hoping when I do I'll have a whole stack of new and exciting stories to share!

Peace, love and happiness to you all.

xox
Nelo